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Jauh Melangkah

Kupandangi cakrawala barat
Sapuan aneka warna bersemburat
Langit tak berawan petang
Saat Sang Surya tlah menghilang
Menyisakan lembayung di ujung biru
Sesaat itu ada kurasakan haru

Sekilas kulihat bayangmu melintas
Menari di luasnya langit tak terbatas
Dan kutersadar betapa jauh ku t'lah melangkah
Tak nampak sudah persimpangan kita berpisah
Kau tak tampak nyata dalam benak
Tak lagi kurasakan getar dalam gerak

Terpikir kadang tuturmu dulu
Yang membuatku selalu meragu
Dan kini kupaham mengapa kau begitu
Betapa indah saat-saat itu
Saat kau satu dalam kalbu
Dan kini ku t'lah melangkah jauh

Tak lagi kau hadir dalam mimpi
Tanpamu tak lagi kurasakan sepi
Betapa jauh kau t'lah melangkah
Dan lajunya tak bisa kucegah
Tapi tentangmu kusimpan rapat
Dan hatimu tetap terasa dekat

Dia Yang Ada

kupandangi ia di sebelahku
tengah pulas usai pertarungan seru tadi
pergumulan jiwa yang dimenangkan tubuh
sekedar tuk melegakan dahaga badani

kubelai pipinya, menepiskan galau hati
bagaimana ini semua terjadi
tetapi ini telah terjadi

kukecup keningnya, berharap dia seseorang
tapi dia bukan
dia yang ada

bukan yang kuimpikan yang mengisi relung jiwa
dan impian malam hari
dia yang ada

dan bukan pula ia milik
tak ingin kubayangkan ia pulang nanti
ke pelukan buah hati
dan aku mematikan nurani

entah apa yang tengah kulakukan ini
kuharap kutak membunuh hati
dengan bermain api


(ditulis di sesi CS Writers' Club Kamis itu di Gelato Secrets Setiabudi One)

Borrow

Woke up this morning and I feel pain
It was sadness before but now I feel lost
Feels like being punished just for being
So much in love with you but it's forbidden

You put smile on my face, the best one ever
But it's taken away from me, it hurts like shit
Like finding a gown that fits but too expensive
I can only adore you for I'm not allowed to steal

You came out of nowhere, out of my league
Touched my heart so gentle just by holding hands
You showed me love so true I didn't know existed
Now I have to let you go, tell me how do I do that?

I no longer ask the 'why', I prefer the 'how'
How much joy you bring to me just by your 'hello'
How your love heals all of my previous wounds
And whispering to me it's gonna be all right

With you it's just love, somehow it scares me
I've been in pain for so long, I wasn't prepared
Now I know what those love songs' about
I really wish this won't be a sad one

If I could wish to be selfis…

Can You Imagine

Can you imagine
How perfect we could be
The way you look at me
The way you hold my hand
The way you protect me
And how I cherish all that

Can you imagine
Our life together
You'll make a living
I'll make you home
You'll do your hobby
I'll be your cheerer

Can you imagine
If life is that simple
That you were mine
And I am yours
But in this lifetime ours isn't
And I really don't know what to do

First Sight

They fell in love at first sight
But things didn't seem so right
He was too young and plain
She was too deep with brain

So they became best friends
But feelings are inavoidable
He was so adorable
And she's just so clever

Soon they part on their own ways
They couldn't stand being with each other
He doesn't like feeling this much
She doesn't want to be hurt

Still fate want them be together
Because there are things they need to learn
So he starts digging deep
And she tries to be relax

They fell in love at first sight
Just like being set from above
No matter how they think of running
They belong together

So complicated, yet meant to be

Broken..

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Imbroglio

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It should be another ordinary vacation day in Bali for me, but something in the air says something else. From the mesmerizing sunset to the colourful twilight sky that I just witnessed on the beach, I know there should be something special about the day. But my whole day already went on like any regular day... until it was dinner time.

"Excuse me," a man softly touches the back of my lower left arm. I glance at him with a plate full of the dish I picked from the food counter on my left hand. My right hand is grabbing the utensils from a smaller counter. I stare at him for two seconds, waiting for the reason of why he provoked me.

"Deidre," he looks relieved when I look back. But it's not my name he just called. I stare at him for a longer bit. There is something in his eyes that sends me a shiver. A strange warm sensation that makes me shiver.

"I'm sorry, wrong person," I smile, both to cover the awkwardness and to get rid of the s…

Sepulang Sirkus

Aku berjalan pulang dengan hati riang
Seulas senyum menghias wajah yang girang
Ribuan kali telah kutonton sirkus itu
Ribuan kali pula ia dapat memukauku

Empat tahun aku menyimak dengan setia
Mengenal betul setiap pelosok dan sudutnya
Walau hanya sekian hari dan tak menetap
Kunanti saat ia kembali untuk kutatap

Atraksinya merangsang imaji dan hatiku tertambat
Wahananya mengguncang tubuhku dengan nikmat
Itulah sirkus yang membuatku mengharap
Dalam setiap kunjungnya yang hanya sekejap

Hingga saat ia berkemas untuk pergi
Terkadang berbulan tanpa kabar dan berita
Tak tahu kapan ia akan kembali lagi
Menyapaku dengan hiburan gambar dan cerita

Ingin rasanya kumiliki sirkus itu
Yang memberi tujuan dalam hidupku
Karena hampa kurasa tanpa hadirnya
Meski sesaat kumerasa memilikinya

Selesaikan Sudah

Hening..
Hidupku sunyi tanpa jiwa yang gaduh
Hanya pikirku berkelana menjelajah jauh
Walau tetap hati hampa tanpa hadirmu

Sepi..
Kujalani hari berganti warsa
Berbekal rasa yang tak kunjung pudar
Walau harap tak lagi ada di sana

Koyak..
Berkeping terserak sukmaku terburai
Merintih jiwa yang tak sempurna tanpamu
Walau tabah menapaki bergulirnya waktu

Lelah..
Tuk meneguk kecewa; kupaksa menelan rasa
Hingga ku muak mengecap semua
Walau tetap ku ikut mengaliri hari

Selesaikan sudah
Tak lagi dapat ku tahan
Kuingin sakit ini selesai
Cukup buatku di sini

Kuberharap segera mati

Mengikut Ayah

Dalam sepi kau meninggalkanku
Biarkan ku membusuk dengan pikirku
Dan angan tentang masa yang takkan pernah ada
Juga kenangan yang terkubur di dalam dada

Dalam sunyi kurenungi sendiri
Apa makna lahirku ke atas Bumi
Jika perih yang kurasai dalam hati
Walau indah juga kujalani dalam hari

Bukan ku membenci hidup
Tapi kadang kurasa cukup
Entah apa masih ku sanggup
Jika boleh kumintakan penutup

Lelah.. Jiwa ini lelah terdera
Walau senyum selalu kupaksa
Telah jauh makna ku jelajah
Ku ingin hanya mengikut ayah...

Menahan Rasa

Kunanti kamuYang berjanji untuk ada
Bertahan akan tinggal

Tak pernah janjikan kapan
Atau bagaimana pertemuan mendatang
Bilakah mungkin ada
Atau hanya angan belaka

Dua insan mencinta
Namun terpisah jarak dan masa
Entah apa rencana Sang Pencipta

Tiap-tiap kutunggui
Menatap tembok yang tersanding pagar
Berharap sosokmu kan muncul
Seperti dulu berbagi rasa

Tak jua kau hadir lagi
Meninggalkan remah sisa harapku
Tuk kembali menunggui hari

Dan ku hanya menahan rasa
Yakinkan kau pasti kembali
Walau mungkin hanya angan belaka

Menanti Kau Kembali

(Bali)

Hari ini kudengar kabar kau kembali
Setelah sepi ratusan hari kulalui
Terkadang berharap mendapatimu hadir
Tapi kusadari itu hanya mimpi

Kutahu harapku percuma
Kau takkan pernah kembali
Puluhan harap terbangun semua runtuh
Dalam diam ku terus menunggu

Poem For My Bride Sister

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A sister was born when I was four years old
An independent girl, oh she's smart and bold

She followed me around, I considered annoying
Years later I found, it was me she was admiring

Funny how we figure out, she became my soul mate
God had designed us as sisters; it is out fate

To have someone that always supporting and care
A soul who accepts and gives the best of prayer

Who listens when you don't have the voice
Who will find you doors when they say you don't have a choice

Who reads your face; you don't even have to write
Who will light the room up in a dark stormy night

When Daddy passed away, I felt responsible
But my baby sister is no longer so little

Today I see you here standing so beautiful; such a doll
In a white wedding gown so purely as your soul

Wearing the smile the man beside you have given
Your life will start anew; a book to be written

A love that will keep you alive and safe, even without me
But far apart we may, sisters we'll always be


This poem was my wedding gift …
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