Posts

Borrow

07.11.17

Woke up this morning and I feel pain
It was sadness before but now I feel lost
Feels like being punished just for being
So much in love with you but it's forbidden

You put smile on my face, the best one ever
But it's taken away from me, it hurts like shit
Like finding a gown that fits but too expensive
I can only adore you for I'm not allowed to steal

You came out of nowhere, out of my league
Touched my heart so gentle just by holding hands
You showed me love so true I didn't know existed
Now I have to let you go, tell me how do I do that?

I no longer ask the 'why', I prefer the 'how'
How much joy you bring to me just by your 'hello'
How your love heals all of my previous wounds
And whispering to me it's gonna be all right

With you it's just love, somehow it scares me
I've been in pain for so long, I wasn't prepared
Now I know what those love songs' about
I really wish this won't be a sad one

If I could wish to …

Can You Imagine

03.11.17

Can you imagine
How perfect we could be
The way you look at me
The way you hold my hand
The way you protect me
And how I cherish all that

Can you imagine
Our life together
You'll make a living
I'll make you home
You'll do your hobby
I'll be your cheerer

Can you imagine
If life is that simple
That you were mine
And I am yours
But in this lifetime ours isn't
And I really don't know what to do

Broken..

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Imbroglio

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It should be another ordinary vacation day in Bali for me, but something in the air says something else. From the mesmerizing sunset to the colourful twilight sky that I just witnessed on the beach, I know there should be something special about the day. But my whole day already went on like any regular day... until it was dinner time.

"Excuse me," a man softly touches the back of my lower left arm. I glance at him with a plate full of the dish I picked from the food counter on my left hand. My right hand is grabbing the utensils from a smaller counter. I stare at him for two seconds, waiting for the reason of why he provoked me.

"Deidre," he looks relieved when I look back. But it's not my name he just called. I stare at him for a longer bit. There is something in his eyes that sends me a shiver. A strange warm sensation that makes me shiver.

"I'm sorry, wrong person," I smile, both to cover the awkwardness and to get rid of the s…

Menanti Kau Kembali

Bali, Mar 11, 2016

Hari ini kudengar kabar kau kembali
Setelah sepi ratusan hari kulalui
Terkadang berharap mendapatimu hadir
Tapi kusadari itu hanya mimpi

Kutahu harapku percuma
Kau takkan pernah kembali
Puluhan harap terbangun semua runtuh
Dalam diam ku terus menunggu

Sepulang Sirkus

Aku berjalan pulang dengan hati riang
Seulas senyum menghias wajah yang girang
Ribuan kali telah kutonton sirkus itu
Ribuan kali pula ia dapat memukauku

Empat tahun aku menyimak dengan setia
Mengenal betul setiap pelosok dan sudutnya
Walau hanya sekian hari dan tak menetap
Kunanti saat ia kembali untuk kutatap

Atraksinya merangsang imaji dan hatiku tertambat
Wahananya mengguncang tubuhku dengan nikmat
Itulah sirkus yang membuatku mengharap
Dalam setiap kunjungnya yang hanya sekejap

Hingga saat ia berkemas untuk pergi
Terkadang berbulan tanpa kabar dan berita
Tak tahu kapan ia akan kembali lagi
Menyapaku dengan hiburan gambar dan cerita

Ingin rasanya kumiliki sirkus itu
Yang memberi tujuan dalam hidupku
Karena hampa kurasa tanpa hadirnya
Meski sesaat kumerasa memilikinya

Selesaikan Sudah

Hening..
Hidupku sunyi tanpa jiwa yang gaduh
Hanya pikirku berkelana menjelajah jauh
Walau tetap hati hampa tanpa hadirmu

Sepi..
Kujalani hari berganti warsa
Berbekal rasa yang tak kunjung pudar
Walau harap tak lagi ada di sana

Koyak..
Berkeping terserak sukmaku terburai
Merintih jiwa yang tak sempurna tanpamu
Walau tabah menapaki bergulirnya waktu

Lelah..
Tuk meneguk kecewa; kupaksa menelan rasa
Hingga ku muak mengecap semua
Walau tetap ku ikut mengaliri hari

Selesaikan sudah
Tak lagi dapat ku tahan
Kuingin sakit ini selesai
Cukup buatku di sini

Kuberharap segera mati